JoAnn And Her Penny Loafers

Writer's notes : This hub is meant only for comedy humor. A lot of what I say in it involves nothing more than fantasy.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Youth,romance, love and it's wonderful moments. When we were young , and when we rode around in an over sized Chevrolet Biscayne station wagon , Joann would light my cigarettes..

She was seventeen, with darling plump squeezable firm ,cream cheese contoured delicious sweet little tits, and I was twenty one. We left Louisiana momentarily to go, and get married in Beaumont , Texas.. My chick had curly natural black hair, and still has dark brown eyes. One of her kin folk was bent on trying to upset me. He was like a very unhealthy trouble making stinker who smoked , and weased terribly, who had the sound of death in his throat. I figured one day he would keal over dead, and that is exactly what he did after chain smoking like a choo choo train all of his life.

One day I was sitting on a porch by her uncle's place. I did not want to go there, but Joann , and I were like Elmer's glue. We always wanted to stick together.

On that day at her creepy uncle's house, he decided to say something strangelyweird which almost made me want to crack him on the nose.

I figured he might not have liked me so he said , " Did you know that Joann is not what you think she is."

So in return I said, " What in the corny crap do you mean by that hoss ? Have you always been a turd , or did you just happen to grow up to become one ? "

He said, " Have you noticed how red Joann is, and how strong her bones are, and how big her daddy is ? "

In response I said, " So what , and you better hope I do not tell her daddy what you said because he will skin you a brand new stupid butt where your skinny one is now . "

Joann, and I were very much in love. Nothing could ever change that. No one could ever stop that wonderful beautiful magic of fantastic heart warming feverish sex that we always had a million and a half times . We had trillions of sexually depraved acts of fornication under our belts, and nothing could ever rip our love apart .

Joann always wore penny loafers. I asked her why did she put penny's in the fricking slots of her stupid loafers . She told me that your supposed to put them in penny loafer you pethetic jerk off pot of poo, so I never asked her that kind of weasal slop again because she would get awfully sore over her loafers.

Joann wore short sweet white socks with her penny loafers which always made me mean, and horribly horny.And it was always hard for her to find new penny loafers because some shoe stores did not carry them, those low life stinking scum warts !. I don't know why I was always enraged when I was young. I guess it was just because I was simply a miserable low life worthless stinking bucket of hog slop.

Sometimes it took us all day to find those shoes, and I was always screaming my brains out because Joann took forever to buy a stinking pair of shoes, or a dress. The girl had very strong super human legs. They were so strong because she was a high school Tigerette, a kind of a cheer leader girl at the football games , and she loved to dance her buns off.I was cripple walking out of her shoe store, but she was like a spring chicken, wild and spunky. I tell you the girl was not human !

Joann loved to jump up, and down on the football field like she lost her mind over dumb ridiculous football games. She danced around waving those thingss that looked like Pom Poms. She had some very wild fine sexy moves , and very sweet cute short skirts, and wore two pony tails, one on each side of her sweet skull. Joann had very powerful legs like a wild Arabian beauty . When she wrapped those sweet creamy delicious legs around my waist , and locked them , I was in mule rump Heaven. Sometimes I suffered in extreme excruciating agonizing terrible screaming pain because all I ever needed was just a little bit of good old fashioned screwing in my life . The price of trying to get those precious screws could be excruciating agonizing horrible miserable pain if she was not in a generous mood to dish them out.

When we went off to get married forty years ago, she acted really sophisticated and wanted to smoke.

I said , " Get that filthy, nasty, disgusting cigarette out of your punk ass mouth girl. Have you lost your miserable marbles ! Well have you, are what ! They will make your breath smell like a horses behind, and someday choke you to death you stupid little freak ."

But like a fool I continued to smoke like a spoiled rotten punk whelp.. Later I quit the things many years ago, and glad Joann never decided to ever smoke.

I think Joann is part Cherokee Indian. Joann can be very quiet, and you should never make her angry, or she will kill you, or mangle your brains with a hatchet.

One morning I woke up feeling real bad, and noticed I had no hair. Not only was my hair gone, my scalp, the skin covering my skull , and brains were gone. Joann had finally had her fill of all of my miserable filth , and so she decided to get even I guess. I learned something awful about women. They always get even.

She was sound to sleep with her favorite little teddy bear by her side. There was a bloody hatchet on the kitchen table. I noticed my scalp was lying on the floor next to her penny loafers.

I woke her up because I was nearly dead, and almost bleeding to death because my hair, parts of my skull, and scalp were on the floor.

Joann's response was, " How do I know what happened to you! Maybe you tripped and hurt yourself. Maybe a flying saucer with aliens molested you, and scalped you. Maybe the Internal Revenue came to collect the money you tried to cheat Uncle Sam. Maybe a jack rabbit bit you. Maybe and Oldsmobile bumped you. Maybe escaped prisoners from Alcatraz gang banged you. How the hell do I know what happened to you, you worthless good for nothing ass crack !

Joann was obviously very upset so I apologized for waking her up, and super glued some of my brains, my hair, flesh, and skull back on my head, and asked her if she would like some ice cold Dr. Pepper with a straw.

I brought Joann some cold pop, then I tried to get a piece of butt from her, and she popped my sore head, and then I cried myself to sleep. And she told me to shut my mouth.

God Bless Everyone.